How do you say sorry to a person that you hurt so badly, they truly don’t want to hear your voice or see your face ever again. How do you ask forgiveness when your not sure what happened. Or you feel it wasn’t that bad. Then again how can you be so good at acting the part, that you believe you are that part? How and why is it possible for me to sincerely fake sincerity? It’s so hard for me to admit I’m wrong. Well I was wrong. In the way I treated so many people. Friends, family, acquaintances. People I’ve never even meet have an impression of me that I will never be able to change. I mean how horrible is that? I guess a lot of things have been catching up to me lately. I was thinking of when I was back at Misericordia and how I treated some people. It makes me sick. And that’s only one place I’ve been. I was thinking of this one girl from there. Someone who I was friends with, and actually cared for. Well I guess she saw a side of me that was just despicable. Now she actually hates me. It takes a lot to really hate someone. And I was able to pull it off. I used the same tongue to give comfort, and love to the broken, that I used to alter the minds of women who trusted me. How disgusting could I be to use the gifts I was given for my own pleasure. If there are any women that read this and know what I am talking about, I Truly, Truly am sorry. (If you would be kind enough to get in touch with me I’d like to apologize face to face.) Not only did I break the trust and abuse the friendship of women who were willing to confide in me. But I was so two faced to my brothers to. Saying one thing, and doing another. Lying about anything and everything. I was so good at it that I was even believing it myself, In the back of my mind I was just in denial. Now I am sitting here broken, filled with regret and remorse. Everything that I’ve done, is catching up to me right now. I feel like I’m getting hit by a wall. Its difficult to say sorry to everyone I hurt. Scratch that, its scary as hell to put myself out there hoping people will forgive me. None of witch I deserve. Opening up to people is a difficult and frightening thing for me to do. I’ve never really opened up to anyone, I’ve faked it. And that’s just disturbing. Well I’m sorry if I’ve hurt ANY of you. I hope you can forgive me. I know certain people are sitting here confused, others I’m sure this hit close to home. Feel free to contact me to talk about anything guys. Yea so I’ve been sitting here for about an hour debating if I should post this, Part of me knows I should. But still, it is terrifying putting myself out there like this. Open to ridicule and mockery. If you have an criticism, constructive or destructive, feel free to say it to me. I guess here goes nothing and everything at the same time | 
